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I am thankful for so many things, but tonight I am thankful for my three children.
I am thankful that God gave me children at all – when I am one who is not “supposed” to have any children at all.
I am thankful that God allowed us to adopt Samuel. I am thankful that He brought that precious little boy into our lives. I listen to Samuel sing – with such an innocence that I am reminded of how I am to come to God. Like a child. Like MY child. I am thankful for my Samuel.
I am thankful for the adoption loss that we experienced. The failed match that we had to walk away from. That failed match, though painful, if allowed to go through, would have kept us from having our sweet Samuel.
I am thankful for my Caleb. My boy who seems to always smile. My child that we weren’t supposed to be able to conceive. My child who is a mirror image of his daddy, yet whose personality is so much like my own.
I am thankful for my third child. The child we lost to miscarriage just two weeks ago. I didn’t blog about it then because I simply didn’t know how. God took that sweet little one Home with Him two weeks ago today. That very early miscarriage opens a new chapter in the book of infertility and loss for me, one I was hoping would never open. I am thankful for the short amount of time I did have with this little one. And when I grieve, God is near. In my quiet time, He reminds me how He sees my pain, how He is my comfort. I am thankful for the peace that He alone can give, spreading His love over my hurting heart like a healing salve. God is good.
So tonight, I am thankful.